Personal Experience Narrative
Grade 4 Sample
Snowed
Summarizing Framework
This is a story about Danny and me.
The experience was playing in the snow.
The experience concluded when the boys were so cold they went inside.
What worked:
Feedback with Prescriptive Feedback:
CHOOSE a Focus Skill: One skill that will make the biggest impact
For this student, genre and organization needs to be the focus.
Genre and Author’s Purpose: This story was difficult to summarize because it is a classic list of actions rather than a fully elaborated main event. What is the main event from the list of actions in the middle of your story? The story does not begin as close to the main event as possible because the main event is unclear.
Elaborative Detail: This student needs modeled lessons in description of setting and feelings. Elaborative detail is a critical foundational skill that builds the essential parts of the narrative story.
Entertaining Beginnings:
Main Event: What is the main event? Student needs to establish a single, significant event. Is it the snowball fight? Is it going sledding? Is it building an igloo? Once that is established then add a balanced mix of action, description, thoughts/feeling, dialogue, and sound.
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